"For crying out loud! An angry hubby arranges the kidnapping of the lout who disrupts his romantic life: his wife's infant."
-- DVD description for the episode
The Kidnapper is the seventh episode of the seventh season of Tales from the Crypt and the eighty-seventh episode overall. The episode was released on June 7th, 1996.
A simple young man (Steve Coogan) takes in a homeless pregnant woman (Julia Sawalha) and falls in love with her. But he becomes envious and jealous when her child is born, so he sets out to get rid of the kid forever.
Opening Segment EditReferee: "Out!"
Crypt Keeper: "What? Are you blind? That ball was on the line, pal! Oh, hello, kiddies. I was just warming up for the Wimbletomb Tennis Tournament. Normally I love a bit of stiff competition, but this guy is driving me nuts! Still, the match isn't over yet. We're playing beast two out of three. Which brings to mind the man in tonight's tale. He's about to play a little die-breaker of his own in a sickening hacks-hibition I call "Kidnapper."
Closing Segment Edit"Poor Daniel. I bet he never thought he'd get such a kick from falling in love. At least in the end, he did the writhe thing. As for me, kiddies, I've got to get back to my game. I've been on quite a winning shriek."
[Crypt Keeper hits ball and knocks head off skeleton]
"Now, that's what I call a service break!"
- This is the lowest-rated episode of the series on IMDb.